Chasm of Unanswers - Waiting for the Obverse?

I find myself at a place of smitten. He is sweet and absolutely hysterical. I am serious, but I love to laugh. He is rather brilliant and completely adorable. I am academically inclined, but I prefer the spiritual. He is privy to the things of the Spirit - the deeper things of God. This I appreciate, but my spirit is wrestling. I am not sure with what as it goes between two. Is this You or is this my jaded goggles telling me to put him under a magnifying glass. He thinks I am the fairest of them all. I feel like a princess. I mean I know I am a princess, but now I am held as one in the natural. Therefore, is he for real or must I stick him unconditionally under a magnifying glass. I will lose him if I do this, but if I do not I might be devastated. He preached in his past and now he writes. Beautiful is how I feel when I am with him. Am I selling myself short? Am I settling? Everyone else says I am and they even go so far as to deliver terrible information about him. One in particular says he has 'beauties' all over town despite never having met him. Is that discernment or is that judgment? Is that based on truth or based on assumption of his actions toward me and the patterns of man's past in such circumstances? Priceless is how I feel when I am with him. Am I being manipulated? Am I settling? Am I selling out? I seek HIS face in the night, HIS face in the morning. Yet I think about him all day and analyze whether or not HE is telling me 'NO'. I am blurred! I am unsure! Do the superficial 'red flags' dictate or do those I trust dictate. they point out the superficial or the things they sense in their 'spirit'. Yet in the past this has served my world pain. Do I continue with what is fun with what feels right, but wrong at the same time. Is it wrong because HE says so or because of fear? YIKES. This madness must come to a halt!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do I move forward with him or are YOU telling me 'no'. Is fear telling me no by means of ultimate lifelong sabotage? I want to soar and love another as HE loves me, but it just......??????????? Is he right for me just based on his heart, his sweetness, his character? Is he for me or against me? Will YOU please tell me! Shut it down or keep it breathing! What do YOU want for me? I wait.